This guide will help all introverted moms to balance their mom’s life. Learn how to deal with the ups and downs of motherhood as an introverted mother.
As an introvert, you can be a “good” mother as well as an extrovert (and vice versa).
Your strengths and weaknesses are just different. None of the personality types is “better” per se than the other.
However, as a more introverted person, you should be aware that you have different needs.
And therefore have to use different strategies than extroverts to balance motherhood and your own personality in a healthy way.
INTROVERTED – EXTROVERTED: WHAT’S THE DIFFERENCE?
Extroverts draw their energy from interacting with other people.
If you spend too much time with yourself, you will quickly feel drained, irritated and bored.
Introverts, on the other hand, draw energy from themselves, from their own ideas and thoughts and therefore above all need enough rest and retreat to recharge their battery.
Of course, nobody is “only” introverted or “only” extroverted.
Everyone is somewhere in between on the scale.
It is therefore important to find out the individually suitable dose of external stimulation for everyone on the one hand and withdraw in yourself on the other.
WHAT HAPPENS WHEN AN INTROVERTED WOMAN BECOME A MOTHER?
As with all women, a lot of changes with introverted women as soon as they start (have to) look after a child 24 hours a day.
However, there are special needs that are reported to the mothers in this connection.
The normal family madness – particularly exhausting for introverts
The usual daily routine with children – noise, confusion, the variety of tasks to be done at the same time, children’s demands for attention and activities – can quickly lead an introverted mother to her limits.
It overcomes the feeling of having to explode at any moment.
To compensate, as an introverted mother, you always have to provide rest periods.
If you find someone to take the kids off your hands, you can make the most of the “time” you have gained if you stay all to yourself.
STRENGTHS OF INTROVERTED MOTHER:
1. Exude calm
As an introverted mother, you are the family’s resting place. You “automatically” ensure that the children are not overstimulated and take sufficient breaks.
2. “Let go of” the child
It is easy for you to accept that every child develops in its own way and at its pace and needs its personal freedom.
As a mother, you manage to stay in the background and let the children have their own experiences.
3. Listen carefully
Listening is easy for you as an introvert.
You can fully concentrate on your child’s concerns, are compassionate, reflect on what has been said and are not out to push your views to the fore.
This makes your child feel valued and accepted.
4. Rarely bored
As an introvert, you don’t get bored easily.
While extroverted young mothers can quickly feel lonely if they (have to) spend a lot of time alone with babies, introverts like to be in their thoughts and can do well alone.
WHICH IS DIFFICULT FOR AN INTROVERTED MOTHER
1. Small talk
Introverted women do not appreciate the fact that they talk to mothers who are not (yet) very familiar with them in a superficial way:
Crawling groups, baby courses, carnival parties, fairs, events around kindergarten, sports clubs or school are therefore rather tiring because as stimulating.
2. A lot of hustle and bustle
Working with several children at the same time – for example at children’s birthdays, when several children are visiting or when several families are gathering – is a challenge for an introverted mom.
After which she needs a lot of time for herself to regain strength.
3. Extroverted children
If an introvert has an extrovert child, it is difficult for her to understand and support her strong need for activities and being with friends.
It is important to find a good compromise with tact, with which both sides can live well.
The older and more independent the children become, the easier it will be to do so.
Don’t expect yourself to live an extrovert
It is important for your self-esteem to recognize and accept yourself as an introvert.
If you compare your life with the more extroverted mothers, you may see that they do a lot more on weekends, go out more often in the evenings.
Maintain a large network of friends and in your eyes simply “do” more than you.
But why should you strive for this way of life when it doesn’t fill you?
Extroverts need external stimuli to recharge their batteries, just as you yourself need the times of retreat to feel good.
It is not “better” per se to spend your life doing many activities.
Life is good and successful if you feel comfortable with it – you should align it accordingly.
It’s okay if you need time without children
Do you sometimes wish to spend more time without your children?
Do you have a guilty conscience about this and wonder if you are a “bad” mother?
Accept as part of your personality that you need time to be alone to regain your strength. Only then can you go back to your children full of energy.
It is perfectly okay for you to feel good about handing over your children to kindergarten, grandma, grandpa or a babysitter.
Your child benefits twice: It is an enrichment for the child to have several caregivers, and it is good for mom to be able to do everyday life in a good mood after a breather.
Are you an introvert too? How do you deal with it?
WHAT TO READ NEXT:
- Mindfulness In The Life of A Modern Mother
- Mom Rage: 7 Healthy Ways to Deal With Your Anger
- Strengthening Resilience for Moms: How to Cope With Daily Stress
PS: Families are busier than ever. Feeling overwhelmed doesn’t have to be your new normal. This Family Routines Course will help you simplify the many daily tasks confronting you — creating a happier family and a much happier you.