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In this article you will learn:
- The characteristics of positive parenting.
- The guidelines for promoting positive parenting.
- And how to put positive parenting into practice according to your child’s age.
The way to raise children is a subject that gives rise to some debate and, often, conflicting opinions.
The styles and techniques can vary, from the most aggressive branches, to the parents who give them everything done, covering the way for them.
Positive parenting is still the choice of all those who claim that children understand the consequences of certain actions and behaviors.
This is characterized by:
- and consists of teaching them to do the right thing using positivity and patience.
Instead of implanting fear or excessive punishment.
In no case should it be confused with permissive upbringing, since it is not about consenting to everything.
But knowing how to act so that they do not behave in a certain way.
On many occasions, the application of it can become a complicated task. Children have infinite ways to surprise us, depending on their age:
- painted walls,
- broken objects,
- fights with their siblings or schoolmates,
- we just have to be clear about guidelines.
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Have realistic expectations and not compare. To begin with, we should not assume that because children are a certain age they can and should do one thing or another.
It is not always that way. We must also know their abilities and limitations and, in no case, compare their actions with those of their peers.
WHAT IS POSITIVE PARENTING
Positive parenting refers to learning and relationships that form between parents and children.
Helping them develop properly and relate constructively and non-violently with others.
In addition, it increases academic achievement and expectations about the future, instills self-esteem and self-confidence, and reduces behavior problems.
WHAT ARE THE CHARACTERISTICS OF POSITIVE PARENTING
1- The recognition: This is to recognize the child and capabilities.
2- Empathy: The ability to put yourself in the other person and understand how he feels.
3- Effective communication: Refers to the dialogue, which promotes an open and trusting relationship.
4- The equal interaction: is linked to the understanding and proper use of power and hierarchy in relationships.
5- The negotiation: The ability to resolve conflicts and problems that all parties remain compliant. Keep in mind that when negotiating there are no winners or losers, but agreements.
WHAT ARE THE GUIDELINES FOR PROMOTING POSITIVE PARENTING
1- The love: Show love and show that you want. The child must feel secure in the love his parents feel for him.
2- The child’s knowledge: Know their concerns, fears, interests, temperament, etc.
3- The Communication: Promoting dialogue, so you can express yourself and know that you have him in mind. And therefore, you can count on you when you have a problem or concern.
4- Respect: Show tolerance and treat it with dignity.
5- Identify your emotions: It is important to put yourself in their shoes to understand their point of view. We must not forget that they are children and cannot judge their ideas or actions as an adult.
6- Getting to their physical height: It is interesting to be closer to the child, looking for the dialogue adopting the same height.
The adult must bend down to be at the child’s level. This will give you more confidence. And you will feel relief in a more equal relationship when you have a problem in which you need the approach.
7- Enable their autonomy: Promote the child’s independence by establishing responsibilities in which they feel they have a duty.
Feeling collaborative and necessary will help your self-esteem and your identity within the family nucleus.
HOW TO PUT POSITIVE PARENTING INTO PRACTICE
Here we explain some tips to put positive parenting into practice according to the different stages of development.
Since it must be taken into account that, depending on the age of the child. He will have different needs due to his cognitive, physical, and emotional development.
However, we must not forget that the promotion guidelines set out are common to carry out an adequate positive upbringing.
Positive parenting tips for children ages 0-1
- Talk to him when he’s nervous. That will calm the baby.
- Show affection and encourage him.
- Stimulate it in the creation of sounds and language. They can read stories to him, repeat the sounds he makes, etc.
- Play music to promote brain development.
- Play with him when he’s awake and calm, but let him rest if he’s tired or nervous
- Take him in your arms so he can feel your warmth. That closeness will make him feel loved and safe.
Positive parenting tips for kids ages 1-2
- Encourage reading, reading a little every day.
- Encourage language development by speaking to him and completing unfinished words that he begins to emit.
- Ask him to look up objects, body parts, etc.
- Participate in association games, such as classifying figures by shape.
- It promotes his independence, allowing him to perform certain actions on his own, such as dressing or eating.
- Encourage him to explore and discover the world around him.
- Carry out activities outside the home (walking, going to the park, etc.), to encourage curiosity.
- Reinforce their positive behaviors.
- If you take any action in a negative way, always show him what he should have done.
Positive parenting tips for children ages 2 to 3
- Encourage him to play the role play by playing imaginative role plays.
- Take him for a walk to explore the environment around him.
- Encourage him to become aware of himself by asking his name, age, etc.
- Encourage reading by setting time to read together.
- Seek the development of motor skills and the connection with language for its development and association. Songs that involve movement of the hands, feet, or certain postures can be taught.
- If challenging behaviors appear, you need to teach them acceptable ways to express anger.
- Positively reinforce their behavior, when it is appropriate.
Positive parenting tips for kids ages 3-5
- Read together a little each day. To increase their interest in reading, you can go out to libraries and bookstores and choose the book they like.
- Encourage language production by speaking in complete sentences and using adult words to start learning them.
- Involve him in simple tasks so that he feels an important and fundamental part of the family, at the same time that it will help a feeling of responsibility.
- Be clear and do not change the rules of discipline so as not to create doubts and thus establish limits.
- Give him a limited number of simple options so that he doesn’t feel full (choose what clothes to wear, etc.).
- Encourage socialization with other children.
- Explain and demonstrate appropriate expected behavior.
- Provide help and support in solving their problems when they are frustrated.
Positive parenting tips for kids ages 6 to 8
- Be caring and acknowledge their accomplishments.
- Set clear rules and respect them. Be clear about the behaviors that are acceptable and those that are not.
- Encourage the development of a sense of responsibility.
- Teach him to be respectful and patient (wait his turn, finish a task …) and to know the consequences before doing something
- Talk to him about school, friends, etc.
- By helping to set achievable goals, they will learn to be proud of their accomplishments and less dependent on the approval and recognition of others.
- Do fun family activities (board games, reading, etc.) to promote the union of the family foundation and the child’s confidence.
Positive parenting tips for kids ages 9-11
- Talk to him about the puberty stage, so that he feels prepared and understands the normal physical and affective changes of puberty and faces them with more confidence.
- Promote a sense of responsibility, assigning tasks at home, and making them aware of the consequences of certain acts.
- Put clear rules and respect them, so that they understand the limits.
- Use discipline to protect him, not to punish him.
- Help them differentiate what is good from what is bad. You can talk about things that are dangerous and activities that carry risks, to ensure the safety of the child and prevent problems.
- Know their environment outside the home: friends, your friends’ families, etc.
- Take time to talk about their achievements, their friends, etc.
- Participate in school activities. Get involved in their school environment.
- Be loving and always try to have moments when the family does things together. Find a family connection and togetherness.
- Help them set their own goals, talk about their skills and abilities, and the ones you would like to promote.
- Use positive reinforcement and praise him when he achieves or strives for them. Be proud.
- Motivate him to participate in group activities, thus promoting social behavior.
- Encourage reading, encouraging him to read a little every day.
Positive parenting tips for kids ages 12-14
- Be open and honest when talking about sensitive topics: drugs, alcohol, sexual relations, etc.
- If conflicts arise, show him clearly the goals and expectations, but giving him sufficient autonomy to act and face them.
- Respect their opinions and accept that they have their own ideas and feelings. Start active listening.
- Show interest in school activities and the educational environment.
- Know their environment outside the home: friends and classmates.
- Promote their independence, without neglecting the figure of counselor and support, seeking communication and cooperation on both sides.
- Promote healthy lifestyle habits: healthy food, exercise, etc.
Positive parenting tips for kids ages 15-17
- Hold dialogues about concerns and keep an eye on your behavior changes.
- Show interest in their studies and get involved and offer support.
- Encourage him to participate in extracurricular activities.
- Show affection and find moments to spend time together on things that are enjoyed by both of you.
- Show respect for their opinions and interests.
- Help him to know how to make good decisions, but let him take the initiative and act.
- Praise their efforts and achievements.
- Make them aware of the dangers of the Internet and social networks. Instill wisdom and good sense.
- Respect their need for privacy.
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