This guide will help you learn how to step out of your comfort as a mom. And learn the benefits of stepping out of your comfort zone.
When I first became a mother I was roughly catapulted far out of my comfort zone.
After nine months of a happy pregnancy, everything had suddenly become so difficult and complicated.
For the first few days, my freshly baked mommy’s life consisted of failed attempts to breastfeed with a lot of baby cries, pumping breast milk, sterilizing bottles and applying to curdle wraps on the chest.
I was tired like never before.
But sleep was secondary. It was about my health and that of my baby.
However, recovery was out of the question
It turned out that my baby didn’t particularly appreciate sleeping.
When it was time for the next nap, his mood changed suddenly and a deafening roar started.
All attempts to calm down failed until the child finally fell asleep exhausted.
We found that the shortest crying time could be achieved if we packed the little one into the baby carrier, left the apartment in a hurry and hurried very quickly along the noisy, busy street to the next park.
Under no circumstances was one allowed to stand still or sit down anywhere. Then he was immediately awake and screaming.
So my new rhythm consisted of breastfeeding, changing diapers, playing with the baby for a few minutes and then initiated by a sudden alarm howl, rushing through the park with the baby in the stretcher.
Until the next breastfeeding break. I can hardly remember when I was able to eat or go to the bathroom. In any case, I could not determine the time for this myself.
One “phase” chases the next
That was 9 months ago and of course, my life is still busy and challenging as a mom and running a blog at the same time.
Fortunately, not all parents experience such a tough start in this new phase of life.
And yet every mom and dad will probably agree that we parents are confronted with new, unexpected challenges over and over again.
These can be more or less serious illnesses, development spurts such as the autonomy phase, loose tooth puberty.
And teenage years, difficulties in kindergarten or school, “deviations” in child development or temperament and so much more.
These are the infamous “phases” of our children.
At the beginning of each phase, we are boxed out of the blue out of our comfort zone and have to see how we can cope with the new situation.
What we may not immediately feel: Our children are just as unprepared. They also fall out of their comfort zone.
COMFORT ZONE – WHAT IS IT ANYWAY?
According to Wikipedia, the comfort zone is a “psychological state in which things feel familiar to a person and they are at ease and (perceive they are) in control of their environment, experiencing low levels of anxiety and stress. In this zone, a steady level of performance is possible.”
If you take a step out of the comfort zone, for example by trying something unfamiliar, you will be confronted with stress and fears.
These dwindle as you get used to it so that in the end you have expanded your comfort zone.
This is a great thing because you can develop towards a goal by repeatedly taking the next necessary small step out of the comfort zone.
One example is when I changed my career from working as a Nurse to a full-time mom blogger and stay-at-home mom.
My own professional development out of my respective comfort zone.
In recent years, this has been that one day I dared to publish my first blog article and show myself in a video for the first time.
Through these steps, which required a lot of courage, I gained self-confidence, which accompanies me today with every further step into the unknown.
Yes, but being a mom has nothing to do with it !?
At first glance, it seemed to me that there was a huge difference – on the one hand.
The self-determined, gradual expansion of the comfort zone through freelance work and – on the other hand – the parenting experience.
Comparable to the courageous jump into cold water in contrast to the nasty push into the same by another.
But if you look at it from a distance, I think it’s not like that.
Becoming a parent is a great adventure, a huge step into the unknown.
Being a parent is an endless series of smaller and bigger challenges.
But isn’t it the same if we try to climb a mountain, for example?
I still remember exactly how shocked I was on the evening of my first multi-day hiking tour, how much my whole body ached from the unfamiliar stress that I had been exposing it to for many hours.
Even back then, I hadn’t thought when planning that the hike would be so hard on me. And I had to grit my teeth and walk two more days.
And? What did this experience do to me?
It strengthened me, I felt incredibly good and proud to have pushed my limits. It was the cornerstone for a new, beloved hobby.
Hiking is the one thing I miss most from before I was a parent (aside from sleeping in, of course).
And that’s how I see being a parent. It’s like climbing a high mountain.
You come into countless difficult situations and repeatedly feel the limits of your body and your psyche.
But it is not the mountain, the storm or the long-distance that do you any harm. It is you who has decided to go the way.
You may quarrel and complain and sometimes be discouraged.
But maybe that’s exactly why it is the most beautiful and intense experience of your life that you will live on for a long time.
Because you always got up and went on, defied all odds and learned a lot in the process – about yourself and being human in general.
Not the easy times, but the tough tests make you a strong personality.
Valley of Despair
If you are currently in a valley of despair, this perspective may help you. You CAN get up and move on.
You can adjust your direction and pace, for example, by thinking about how you want to live your life with children so that it feels happier.
So that it fits you and your needs better. It’s like you are adopting a new climbing technique.
You can also get help from someone who can help you on particularly difficult journeys – a midwife, a clever friend or maybe a mom coach.
An experienced mountain guide is sometimes required for difficult stages.
If you see being a parent with all its pitfalls as an adventure, then you suddenly feel self-determined instead of external.
By following this path you will learn everything you need and make mountaineering a new comfort zone.
And by maintaining a strong network of family and friends, you don’t have to go this route alone.
You secure each other and help you shake hands on the hard stages and then enjoy the beautiful view of the mountain top together.
No, all the phases of your children don’t just patter on you to make your life difficult.
It is all part of the great adventure of being a parent and you decide how you want to go the way you have chosen.
The best way to do it is with a delightful smile on your lips, because you know that right now you can taste life in all its fullness.
Here are 5 benefits of stepping out of your comfort zone.
Do you have the feeling that you just need a “mountain guide” to help you along a part of the way?
WHAT TO READ NEXT:
- Introverted Mother: How to Survive Parenthood As an Introverted Mom
- Mindfulness In The Life of A Modern Mother
- Strengthening Resilience for Moms: How to Cope With Daily Stress
PS: Families are busier than ever. Feeling overwhelmed doesn’t have to be your new normal. This Family Routines Course will help you simplify the many daily tasks confronting you — creating a happier family and a much happier you.