10 things you should never say to your child
Words can mark a child’s life more than any act we do. That’s why it is so important to be mindful of what we are going to tell them, even when we are annoyed.
An inappropriate word does a lot of harm to a child for his whole life.
Certain phrases should never be said by parents to their children.
All words have consequences, some positive, and some negative.
That’s why we want to show you what are those phrases that you should avoid as much as possible when addressing one of your children:
10 Things You Should Never Say to Your Kids
1. “I will do it for you”
As a parent, it is natural that you want to take control of the situation and make your child’s life easier.
It is better that you guide them to do things instead of doing everything for them.
2. “Don’t cry”
Especially when it comes to boys, it is quite common to hear this phrase from some parents, which is not healthy for them because they will learn to swallow their emotions.
Avoid blaming your children for expressing their feelings of sadness or frustration through crying.
3. “Why don’t you look more like your sister or brother?
The comparisons are terrible at any point in our lives why use them to make our children feel bad?
Replace these types of phrases with others that highlight all his qualities that make him a unique person.
So he will feel that you respect and admire him as a human being.
Here are 5 Reasons Why You Should Never Compare Your Kids With Others by Meha Sharma of huffingtonpost.
- It will cause self-doubt
- Jealousy will take root
- It will breed negativity
- It will damage the parent-child relationship
- They will grow into jittery and nervous adults
4. “I promise you …”
A mistake that is made when being a parent is to use these words without having the intention or the security of doing something.
A broken promise to a child is a sign that he can’t trust you as much as he thought.
Use phrases like “I will try to” so that your children are not more excited than they should be.
5. To speak wrong of others
You can use many phrases to belittle a person and this can mark the future behavior of your children.
Always remember that you are the role model for them and that they will imitate anything you do or say.
If you want your children to speak respectfully to others, start by doing it yourself.
6. “Because I say so”
This phrase is quite an expression and is used not to justify one of your acts.
Try not to use this phrase and always give them good arguments that explain your actions.
If there is no valid reason, children will not find why to stop misbehavior.
7. “Shut up”
It is a phrase that should not be used with anyone, least of all with your children.
In addition to being rude words, they threaten the ability of a boy or girl to express themselves and will create hostility in any situation.
Instead, point out to him in advance when he should be silent and when he can speak without a problem.
8. “You are so… (any adjective with a negative implication)”
In moments of anger, you can say phrases like these that reinforce an unpleasant feeling in your children.
Giving them negative labels frequently can make them begin to believe that they are what you say.
Use this phrase only to highlight your strengths and the talents they possess; This will strengthen their self-esteem.
9. “You will see when your dad (or mom) gets home”
It is a phrase that is often used to declare a punishment that mom or dad will establish when you get home.
Why shouldn’t you tell them?
It is simply a sign of shaky authority and shows that you don’t know how to control a situation.
When a behavior is left uncorrected at the moment it occurs, the child will forget what he did and it will not mean much to him.
On the other hand, you can create a negative image of mom or dad, even becoming afraid of them.
10. “Leave me alone”
Maybe at some point, you have to say it and that’s not bad.
But when you use it repeatedly, your children can interpret that they annoy you when talking to you and that takes them away from you little by little.
If you are in the middle of a stressful situation, warn them that it may not be the best time to talk.
When you feel better, go to them and share your family time.
10 Things You Should Never Say to Your Kids Related Articles:
- 11 Best Phrases To Calm an Angry Child
- 8 Positive Phrases to Say to Children When They Misbehave
- 11 Parenting Mistakes You Need to Stop Making Now
- How To Get Your Kids To Listen Without Yelling
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- Alfie Kohn, Unconditional Parenting: Moving from Rewards and Punishments to Love and Reason*
- Daniel Siegel, No-Drama Discipline: The Whole-Brain Way to Calm the Chaos and Nurture Your Child’s Developing Mind *
- Brené Brown, The Gifts of Imperfect Parenting: Raising Children with Courage, Compassion, and Connection*
- Gary Chapman, The 5 Languages of Love for Children *